We are generally asked to give in and at times one feels that how long will I give in. Where do I draw the line between giving in and letting go…
Jeetne mei haar hai ya haarne mei jeet.
Giving in is usually at home or among our closest of relations. This is where you generally end up compromising or are asked to compromise.
We feel emotionally low as it is like losing out while the other wins. But if you consider there is no battle and it is a matter of allowing the other person to have his way then you are the winner and not the one who got his way.
It does not make you weak or less strong in any way though the other person might feel otherwise. The one who is able to give in and smile too is a sure shot winner.
Even while one is giving in there is a letting go happening inside. The letting go need not be an external exercise. It is an inner emotion. Let go of all…eventually if one is connected to the divine one knows that this is all but a drama, all but a dream. So what difference it makes who wins or who loses. If giving in is making your near one happy, you give in.
This is to be followed only when there is no moral or any other ethics that you need to cross. There will be hundreds of places one needs to give in, in a family if one wants peace. So even while we give in we let go from within. Now what is it that we let go? The person, his/her behaviour or action or our desire?
We must let go of our ego which was creating a barrier while we gave in. It is the ego that creates the question in the first place. “how long? Why should I? Why always me?”
Understanding that everything happening around me is a long dream, and I am going to live this dream as happily as possible, we decide to give in/compromise and make everyone happy.
Internally we can hold on to what we feel is right. Explore and then decide if what we want or what we feel is right and then work towards it. Why prove to anyone? Let each person live their life the way they want. We need not be affected by the same.
We are affected only when we feel we are sacrificing or we are the ones adjusting for others always. But frankly speaking we never do anything for others. WE always do it for ourselves. Even when we compromise or go along as per the other person’s desires we are still doing it for ourselves. It is our karma and we are clearing it.
Introspection is absolutely necessary when treading purposefully on the spiritual path.
So give in and let go at the same time. Give in to others as it makes them happy and makes you happy to see them happy while we let go of our ego.
Let us keep reminding ourselves that every single thing happening at this moment with me is a return of what I had sent out.
Now if the desire is great to achieve or do something and you are being held back, this again has a karmic reason. So do we give in? Yes, but at the same time one can start working on the question “What do I deeply desire? What do I actually want?”
And if the desire is strong, the path will be paved automatically. Trust in the divinity ,,,surrender to the divine…allow the deepest desire to make the way for you!
Until then count your blessings…pray with gratitude…thank the almighty…involve yourself in as much nishkaam sewa as possible.
Will write more on nishkaam sewa in my next post.